Well, I did it!  Scared of heights,but I did it!

Staci, Jamie, Jordan, and I took on an adventure of a ropes course. (thanks to my close friend June, for gift card…shout out to Elevate Red Creek in Perkinston, Ms).  The course consists of following a “path” 15 to 40 feet above the ground.  Various obstacles must be crossed.  Climb over a wooden bridge dangling by only ropes.  Strap in to a zip line that carries you across a  river.  Climb, pull, twist, grab, jump,….. whatever it takes to get across.  You are safely harnessed, YOU WILL NOT FALL.  Right……………………

We had to go through a ground school to be able to “play”.  We had to sign “the form” so all lawyers would be happy.  This form basically says, “You are taking your life into your own hands.  Don’t do anything stupid.  There are consequences.”  We had to listen to Donna explain the “rules”.   She told each of us how to buckle, how to clip in, how to do what it takes to have fun, (and stay alive!).  I loved how she casually mentioned that if I didn’t do one particular thing, I could die.  Well, that’s just great!!!!!!!

I am deathly afraid of heights.  Get me 4 feet off of the ground and I freeze up.  No, it’s not something I can control.  I know in my head that all is “OK”, but somewhere between the brain waves of my head to the nerve endings in my legs there is a HUGE disconnect.  My legs will not work.  But most crazy of all,…………. my hand will not let go.  I can be on a 6 foot ladder, or an outside elevator, a balcony at the hotel, or the edge of a cliff, or ON A ROPES COURSE!!  Wherever I sense that I’m above the ground,  I freeze.  I can’t move.  I can’t let go.  I’m stuck.  Laugh all you want.  Call me a chicken or scaredy cat.  Don’t matter to me.  At the time, I don’t care.  Cause there is a problem,….. I want to fly, but I’m afraid of heights.

Knowing my self and my “fear” situation, I choose to boldly go where I never choose to go on purpose.  That’s right, I’m on purpose choosing to be four feet above the ground.  (Actually, I’ll be 30 feet and higher on part of this course)  My right hand is “freezing up” as I type this.  All is well, I’m actually having fun with my family on this outing.  Then all of a sudden, out of nowhere, I’m overwhelmed with fear.  Yep, the hand won’t let go, the legs won’t move.  I’m stuck.  Part of me knows that I will not fall.  But a part of me (that controls my hand and legs) has shut down.  Now a part of me is embarassed.  I knew it would happen.  Everybody, and I mean everybody at the ropes course now is watching and taking interest in me.  I’m the perfect example of one of “those people”.  One of those people who are afraid.  Me afraid?  I’m down right petrified, embarrassed, unable to move, and well, mad at myself.

While I’m stuck on the rope ladder like a fly in a spider’s web, a crowd of people have somehow from somewhere gathered.  My family, other families, workers and crew, and the owner/director of the place himself……… Mr. T J.

To be honest, I was expecting to get laughed at, picked on, and in a friendly way, made fun of.  But I was hearing lots of voices.  Voices of encouragement saying “C’mon Dan da Man, You can do it!”  Voices of motivation, voices of support, voices of inspiration all were being heard by me from my loved ones.  I was hearing from complete strangers.  We were in this together,………… and yet, I couldn’t move.

Then I heard God’s voice.

OK, actually, it was T J’s voice.  He’s the leader of Elevate Red Creek.  With a calm reassuring voice, (as if he had known me for years), he said this.  “Dan, you’ve got this.  Take your left hand and move it eight inches to the left.”

When you are scared of heights, to move eight inches you might as well be moving eighteen feet.  For me to move just this small amount, not even noticeable to others, I must do something TOTALLY against my own way of thinking.  I MUST LET GO.

That’s why us “scared of heights” people are like that.  We can’t let go. Fears take control.  I KNOW that I won’t fall, but still there is the fear.

The big step here is not moving my hand eight inches to the left.  The big step is in letting go.

Colossians 3:2 Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.

The biggest step in becoming a Christian is a step so small that it may not be noticeable to others.  You and you alone must hear God’s voice above all the other “voices” of this world.  You and you alone must realize that God can direct and control your life even better than what you might have planned for yourself.  Fears may still be there.  It sometimes may seem totally against your own way of thinking.  But to follow Christ on this Christian journey you’ve chosen, you must take small steps.  Before God Himself can get you to “move your right hand eight inches”, you yourself must do something so small, but at the same time so HUGE that it changes your path forever.  You must let go.

Easier said than done, I know.  It involves trust, faith, letting go and taking each day one step at a time. (even eight inch steps one at a time!)

I enjoyed my time at Elevate Red Creek.  I faced my fears, I made small steps into an adventure filled with more small steps.

I’m enjoying this Christian Journey I call living my life as well.  I face my fears, I make small steps everyday following God’s will and direction.  It’s an adventure.  A Holy Spirit filled adventure.  Not because of who I am, but because of who God is!!  Care to join with me in this Christian way of life?  It’s easy!  Well, ………… first you have to let go.

See Ya!  Dan Ainsworth wilderness preacher